Not long ago, I spent a week with friends at Gitche Gumee Bible Camp in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. I was participating in a senior retreat (not the high school kind). We learned about mentoring and the role of grandparents (and parents) in the generations who are the future. More recently, I attended a women’s retreat where we learned about influence and how in mentoring we invest in each other.
Today as some of my closest friends gathered to pray for each other, our families, and communities, I was thinking again about the impact of that one word “mentor.”
We learn from each other how to navigate these days that make this life what it is.
We first learned from parents, then from teachers, pastors, coaches, and for those fortunate enough to partner up with one, a mentor who articulates important life-enhancing behaviors.
We glean knowledge from listening and from watching others. The common thread in how we learn is guidance and counsel woven through every aspect.
We need guides to teach us things we may never understand without the wisdom of people willing to share from their experiences.
We need guides to pour into us from their wisdom:
To look forward and not back.
To look inward before stepping outward.
To grieve a little for what is lost but be thankful for what is still here.
To plant seeds of encouragement in the dark and heavy dirt.
To be grateful for what happened before and expect the best of life is yet to be.
To be careful with your moments because they become your memories.
Do you wonder how to get from where you are to where you want to be? I promise you, the path is not easy. But it is possible.
Find a guide who has already forged the path and found success. Find a friend who will listen at heart level and hold you up while you find your way.
Seek wisdom. Seek understanding. Don’t give up.
Anyway . . . that’s what I was thinking.
“Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding” (Proverbs 4:7).
P.S.—Quite coincidentally, Alan and I shared dinner with a couple in their 80’s last night who have been in ministry for 60 years! The outpouring of stories and wisdom was fabulous, and the similarities were almost as remarkable as the differences in our experiences, even though they’re Australians and we’re Americans! God is ever gracious, severe in his mercies, surprising, and wonderfully tender both in His training and in His everlasting love!
As we open our new book—2024—filled with 366 blank pages, my prayer is that we grow in grace and that each page will be bright with the radiance of God’s hands upon us . . . molding us into His image of holiness, erasing ugliness and replacing it with beauty: replacing fear with faith, hatred with love, sorrow with joy, war with peace, despair with hope. We make resolutions and desire to improve ourselves, but God is truly the One who can transform us from self-centered creatures into Christ-centered works of art! Even so, come, Lord Jesus!
Whether you’re on top of the world this morning or feel buried beneath waves of sorrow, this is the song my heart is singing to God for you. May our journey together through this year be one of learning to love Jesus more and more. May we walk closely beside our Great Shepherd and find fellowship and contentment as the sheep of his flock.
“O come, let us worship and bow down: let us kneel before the Lord our maker. For he is our God; and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. To day if you will hear his voice, Harden not your heart” (Psalm 95:6-8a).
“I came across this quote while reading Small Great Things by Jodi Picoult.
“Picoult shares an insightful quote by Roxanna Robinson, also a novelist. “A writer is like a tuning fork. We respond when we are struck by something. If we’re lucky we’ll transmit a strong pure note, one that is not ours but which passes through us.”
“This quote reminded me of how I need, how I desperately crave to be struck by God in all of my interactions so that what I do and say is a pure reflection of Him and His love for us. Not from me but from Him.”
Amen, sister!! Here’s a photo of Joyce with one of her grand daughters. Joyce and I have been BFFs for 40+ years, and although she lives in California, we still love being able to keep close in heart and spirit!
“If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal” (1 Corinthians 13:1, NLT).
Are you “in league” with your in-law children’s parents? I have a girlfriend who prays together monthly with her son-in-law’s mother for the needs of their mutual children. What a great idea! I remember praying fervently with the mother of one of my daughter-in-laws, asking the Lord to bless our mutual children with a child, and now they have four! It’s sort of a society of sisters in the faith . . . mothers in love in law or something like that.
Anyway, not long ago I was sitting by this in-love-in-law sister at a picnic sponsored by our mutual kids, and she told me a beautiful story:
“One summer evening years ago Tony and I were down by Reeds Lake walking together. We’d gone out to enjoy the warm, sunshiny evening. We were sitting by some bushes watching all the children at the lake when we noticed one family in particular having so much fun together. It was a big family—multi-generational. Lots of kids with their parents and the grandparents, all laughing and playing. All of sudden we saw our daughter and realized she was a part of this group. We knew she’d gone to spend the evening with her in-laws, but we didn’t know they were going to the park too. And there were a couple of families we didn’t recognize—I guess relatives and their kids visiting from Germany. Anyway, it brought us such joy to see her being happy, and we felt a little like we were looking down from heaven. What it must be like for those who’ve gone before us. We don’t always think about it, but there’s a ‘great crowd of witnesses’ watching us all the time.”
Yes, dear sister. Your beloved husband is now among them, and I know he takes pleasure in seeing how bravely you’ve gone on without him. I’m sure he finds joy in watching the continuing blessing of your big, beautiful family bursting with grandchildren. I am sorry for your irreplaceable loss and the years you’ve had to journey on through the battles of life without the love and companionship of your wonderful husband. But, I am thankful God gave you such a sunlit memory, and I’m grateful for your sharing it with me. What a comfort to know we are never alone. We are surrounded!
“Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:1-2).
Every birthday after 70 seems like a special gift to me, and so I want to say I feel very blessed to be alive and feeling as well as I do! I’m probably not as old (and certainly not as beautiful) as this lady, but I agree with what she says! May God bless us all with a “good, old age!”
“And thou shalt go to thy fathers in peace; thou shalt be buried in a good old age” (Genesis 15:15).
Life seen through the eyes of a child is always surprising! Meet Janice’s grand daughter, Ella, aged two, trying desperately to figure out how to use a magnifying glass.
Now what do you suppose this little angel is seeing? Visions of Bunny riding on a merry-go-round? Her mother smiling? Herself—sweeping across the stage in a breath-taking swirl of pink with silver dots? An ant crawling on the floor? Absolutely nothing? The blackness of darkness in the moment of forever?
We still have our imaginations when we have our eyes closed, but we aren’t going to benefit from a magnifying glass, no matter how tightly we’ve squished it to our face! There are a few basic rules for using a magnifying glass to actually improve our vision: 1. Open our eyes 2. Choose our subject 3. Adjust our focal range until our subject comes into clear view.
Can we translate this spiritually? We can imagine all we want, but what we imagine may have nothing to do with spiritual reality. If we really want to see the spiritual world, we need to pray and ask God to help us understand the scriptures, since faith is increased by feeding on the word of God (Romans 10:17). For anyone who finds the Bible hard to understand, may I recommend starting by reading the Book of John or the Book of Matthew in the New Testament? Even Nicodemus, who’d spent his life studying the Old Testament scriptures, found it hard to understand spirit life. Jesus explained to this Jewish scholar that without a spiritual rebirth, no one can understand spiritual realities (John 3:7). If you find yourself struggling to grasp what Jesus is talking about, let’s use some basic principles for spiritual magnification. Smushing the Bible to our eyes won’t help us see any better, but earnestly asking God to answer these prayers might:
1. Open our eyes: “Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of your law” (Psalm 119:18, ESV). 2. Find our subject: “O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together” (Psalm 34:3). 3. Adjust focal range: “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (Psalm 139:22-24).
“You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13, NIV).
P.S.—If you still have no clue how to understand the scriptures, we could start a Bible study together, or you can take a class through Aqueduct Project: https://www.aqueductproject.org/upcoming-courses.
Chances are that I will plow no new ground with these words. The two stories involved are both well-known internet fodder, and one even went viral for a while. You probably have pondered similar thoughts to these before, so expect nothing profound or new.
Our first story is of a little boy from Edinburgh, Scotland, and it is his story that went viral on the internet. His name is Noel Hopkins and he is two, or was at the time of this occurrence.
So let me set this up for you. He’s two, a young two at that, with round glasses and a delightful accent, and he found his mommy’s lipstick, and there happened to be a mirror that needed some artwork that was at just the right height for the efforts of someone who is two. And so he set about his task.
Now, he wasn’t trying to be bad! Oh no! But when you’re two, things happen. “Things forbidden have a secret charm,” as Tacitus said.
There is always a cop around when you don’t need them. In this case, it was his mommy. She happened upon the little Picasso in the midst of his efforts and caught it on camera.
At first, the little guy was standing beside his masterpiece but his mommy’s tone of voice was probably what clued him into the fact that he was busted.
“Noel, who drew on Mommy’s mirror?” she asked.
Being smart, Noel quickly exited the proximity of the crime scene. Now granted, it was only by a distance of a few feet, but when you are two, that is quite a ways, certainly enough to imply innocence.
That accomplished, he turned about to gaze with astonishment at the desecration wrought upon the mirror and gave his response.
“I don’t know.” he replied plaintively.
“Was it you?”
“No.” Plain and simple, without the slightest hesitation.
It was obvious the wheels were spinning in that little noggin of his. Mommy just might be buying the story; he had better give himself a little more wiggle room. He doubled down . . .
“Who was it?”
“Batman.”
This gets a muffled guffaw from Mom as she stifles her laughter.
“Batman did it?”
“Yes, Batman did it.” He then launches into the details as he creatively throws the Caped Crusader under the bus.
That little stinker! Here he is with his mommy, one who loves him more than he can ever know and whom he is dependent on for everything. And yet he was telling her a string of falsehoods, denying responsibility, and blaming someone else with a natural ease that would make any narcissist proud. No acting lessons, no coaching, just self-interest being pursued.
Being two years old casts a powerful penumbra of innocence round about it. It’s a time when values and standards of behavior are works in progress and the lines haven’t jelled yet. And imaginary figures make handy scapegoats.
Yet, how this sums up the human condition, right back to the garden, hiding amidst the fig leaves. Do a little blaming and finger-pointing and hope you can buffalo someone who loves you more than you can ever know, the King of the Universe. If all else fails even imply it was all His fault for not making the system fail-proof.
How far this is from what God intended! He wanted close, loving relationships with us . . . genuine love demonstrated by obedience expressed in the midst of the gift of free will. And in the place of that, all He got was a load of fig leaves and finger-pointing and blame-shifting. It came as no surprise to Him, He knew all along that was what He was going to get, but He had to give the opportunity. The simplicity and beauty of the trusting, honest relationship He longed for replaced with the complexity of lies and coverups by His children. And it wasn’t Batman who was going to pay the price to get things back on track.
Thomas Vander Woude served as athletic director at Christendom College in Front Royal, Virginia. He and his son Joseph were popular on campus, an important, beloved part of the small campus community. Joseph was born with trisomy-21, Down syndrome. The youngest of the Vander Woude’s seven children, Joseph—or “Josie” as the family called him—and his father were inseparable. The family owned and operated a farm near Nokesville, Virginia, and Josie pitched in alongside the rest with all the chores that accompany any household.
One day in September of 2008 Tom and Josie were toiling away at some yard work when the cover on a large septic tank gave way beneath Josie’s feet and he plunged down into that deep dark pit of sewage. The noxious gas alone in such a place is lethal, let alone the certainty of drowning in the mire. Josie was helpless, panicked in that toxic hole. Tom was losing his child. Too far down to reach his son, Tom went down into the tank with him, trying to hold his son up while he himself was submerged in the sewage. Tomas Vander Woude labored mightily until exhausted. He did the only thing he could do: fixing himself on the bottom of the tank, he became the platform on which Josie could stand. There in the blackness of that tank, as unimaginable foulness filled his mouth and throat and lungs, a loving father gave his life for his child.
And though that vile pit could rob Tom Vander Woude of life, it could not rob him of his love for his son. Josie survived.
So often we seek to encounter God through beauty. His awesome creation hints at His majesty and power and glory. But His Love, oh His Love. His willingness to climb into the pit to save His child. That He can love each and every one of His children with infinitely intense love. He did not send someone else to do the dirty work. No second-string bench warmer was called up. Tabernacling in a tent of human flesh, Jesus did that job Himself, He willingly climbed down into the noxious pit of this world to save His children. For the joy set before Him.
And yes, our lives can be very dark.
But if we can learn to look at the things in our lives
not as what happens to us
but as what happens for us
Opportunities to learn, to grow, to become ever more and more the individual He created us to be
to seek His will.
To be ever aware of His love and patience.
To place our hand in His
and to trust
is to feel His smile, even in the darkness—
to know that it is He who supports us,
and to journey with Him toward the dawn,
that bright and blessed dawn.
Brian, reading this aloud . . .
Brian has been a family friend for twenty years. He has a voice like Garrison Keillor but writes stories that are even more folksy and profound. He really needs to be on Christian radio! Meanwhile, I get the joy of sharing some of his writings with you. Happy Father’s Day coming soon to each of you, and Happy Birthday, Brian!
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved” (John 3:16-17).
Alan and I really relish having some of our grandchildren living in GR.
We see them often and really enjoy spending time with them.
I especially love playing basketball with Dan and Brianna’s older son (8), and their older daughter (just turned 6) keeps me smiling with her precocious conversations and prodigious reading.
One night at a park she was so engrossed in her book that she trailed behind on our walk, reading like Belle wandering through the village from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast.
I think she stopped long enough to see a pair of swans and their five cygnets, but I’m not sure if she noticed anything else.
Well, until we got to Jersey Junction and it was time to order ice cream. That definitely got her attention.
First taste of ice cream for Ellie’s baby sister!
One sunny afternoon, Alan and I babysat so Dan and Brianna could go to a wedding. I spent quite a bit of time with Ellie making play dough cookies for a pretend bake shop.
At one point, I bent over to admire the tray of cookies.
“Grandma, do you dye your hair?”
“No! I tried once, but it’s too much work and bother, so I’m just letting it turn grey.”
She observed me thoughtfully. “It looks like there are rivers of color streaming down from the top of your head.”
My hair is definitely turning grey, especially around my face. The streaks of white that used to be strands of white are definitely turning into streams . . . or more colorfully yet—rivers! Rivers of color. I love it!
Grandchildren have such an ability to see things the way they are, tell things the way they see them, and yet make you feel fine about what they observe. Ellie wasn’t the least bit critical of my hair; she just noticed that it was different. That was fine.
She and I have both shared brown eyes and brown hair (just like her daddy) until now. In America, we’re taught to think grey hair is a negative thing. We’re tempted to try to color our hair so we can hide our age. Why is that? Shouldn’t we be thankful we’ve lived long enough to have grey hair? Being old is an honor and a privilege. I’m thankful every day to be alive even though I’m growing older. It sure beats the alternative!
“Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness.” (Proverbs 16:31, NIV)
“Silver hair is a beautiful crown found in a righteous life.” (Proverbs 16:31, God’s Word Translation)
I think we’re going to be celebrating our 50th anniversary all year, since there’s no single time when we’ll have all our kids in the country at the same time. But, what’s wrong with dragging out joy?
Someone asked me how many grandchildren we have now. The answer is 21, and in the context of counting our blessings, it occurred to me that since 2020, we’ve added three new girls to our family! Here’s the newest addition via Michael and Grace’s family.
Here’s the newest cherub in Daniel and Brianna’s family, born a few weeks before Christmas in 2022.
And here’s our baby’s baby girl, born just a couple of weeks ago in 2023.
New life is one of the most hopeful things on this planet. The hope of springtime. Of renewal. Of new birth and growth and transformation. I’m all for it! I’ve been keeping this photo of our youngest granddaughter as the wallpaper on my phone, and every time I look at it, I’m overcome with a sense of peace. She is safe. She’s at rest. All is right with the world. What a gift!
Even on the personal level, I’m dealing with lots of troubling circumstances. Sudden death of friends. Imminent death of friends with lingering illnesses. Old injuries that aren’t going to heal. Hearts that have been broken. Loved ones undergoing cancer treatments. And on and on. It’s so easy for me (or any of us) to take my eyes off Jesus and look at the waves—like Peter—fearing I might drown.
But, all is not lost! God is on his throne: “God reigns as king over the nations. God is seated on his holy throne” (Psalm 47:8, EHV). I disagree with the former American president, Franklin D. Roosevelt, who famously tried to encourage our nation at the outset of World War 2 with these words: “We have nothing to fear except fear itself.” The truth is that we have nothing to fear but God Himself. Better yet, we only need to fear God if we don’t love and trust Him! We only fear those who might harm us, but God is intent on drawing us to Himself so He can save and heal us.
I resonate with Timothy Keller’s reminder: “What if you’re radically loved because of what Jesus has done? What if your relationship to God is completely dependent, not on your record, but Jesus’ record? Not on your past, but Jesus’ past? Not on your performance, but Jesus’ performance?
“Prioritize these questions for cultural transformation, and let no other particular ideology or political movement tell you another topic is more important.”
Amen, Brother Tim! In the midst of chaos, we can have peace because Jesus is our peace(Ephesians 2:14). In the midst of a world convulsing in fear around us, we can live without fear because “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love” (1 John 4:18, NKJV). How can we make the transition from fear to love and peace? By understanding that God loves us radically, based not on our goodness but Jesus’ goodness—his sinless life and atoning death. If we repent of our sins and accept the gift of Jesus’ death as payment for our sins before God, then we are forgiven by God and taken in as his children! He becomes our Father.
Suddenly, instead of feeling angst because the world seems to be going insane, we can have confidence that God is still on the throne and will work everything “together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). Does that mean we’ll never suffer? No! We do suffer. We will suffer. But, we can also rest assured our suffering has a positive purpose that will be realized some day. Can we trust Jesus to be our Lord and Savior in this life and the next? If so, we can experience peace and love . . . and sleep like rockabye babies—in a tree top or anywhere really, knowing that Daddy will catch us and keep us from falling (Jude 24-25).
New life fills me with a sense of joy and peace, but my grand babies are only a shadow of what I’ve received in Jesus Christ. New birth is a sign of hope for the the world. More good things are yet to come!
“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:6).
Summer Setting 