Just for Pun: Finding the Perfect Job

Washing the car with little girls helpingI’ve been getting notices to apply for Medicare. Scary thought, but it’s about time,  since 65 will be on my cake this fall. Meanwhile, an older cousin passed this series of puns along, and as I’m still knee deep in trying to recover from the last month’s sheer joy of kids and grand kids visiting, I’ll pass it along to you in case you need a laugh (or groan) this morning:

“My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the ax. After that, I tried being a tailor, but wasn’t suited for it–mainly because it was a sew-sew job, and people liked to hem and haw about the price.  Next, I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting.  Then, tried being a chef – figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn’t have the thyme.  Next, I attempted being a deli worker, but any way I sliced it….I couldn’t cut the mustard.

“My best job was a musician but eventually found I wasn’t noteworthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor but never seemed to have any patience.  Next, was a job in a shoe factory; I tried hard but just couldn’t seem to fit in.  I became a professional fisherman but discovered I couldn’t live on my net income. Somehow I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining. So, then I applied for a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn’t fit for the job. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian – until I realized there was no future in it. In my early sixties, I had my last job: working in Starbucks, but I quit because it always seemed like the same old grind.

“Now I’m 65 and applying for my last job: Retirement. Pretty sure I’ll love it!”

“The labour of the righteous tendeth to life” (Proverbs 10:16).

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