Christmas Eve morning I woke up feeling almost euphoric for no particular reason other than I had the most heavenly sense that Baby Samuel is going to make it. Of course, I’ve never considered myself a prophet, and so I’m speaking from my personal experience, not from 100% unshakable, irrefutable foreknowledge. But, I’m just sayin’…I feel a peace that everything will be okay. My daughter’s family was visiting, and she asked if the doctor has an estimated time for when Samuel might be stable and strong enough to leave the hospital. Brianna says the neonatologist won’t hazard a guess yet, since she’ll have to feel sure that Samuel will survive before she’ll try to make any predictions about such pleasant possibilities. So, there’s nothing official, just peace in my heart. But, WOW does peace feel good! (This picture is the most recent…just taken last night after a sponge bath.)When Samuel comes home, then I’ll know, but then it won’t be a matter of faith anymore. It will be fact. It occurs to me that this is generally true of faith. God asks us to trust Him, not because in this life we have 100% irrefutable proof that He exists or that there really is a heaven to gain and a hell to shun. I have a perfect sense of peace that the Bible is true and does show us the way to heaven through faith in Christ, but not because I can prove it…rather, because I experience his peace. The calm assurance of resting in Christ—of feeling his love and believing in his provision for my salvation—is a heavenly thing. Am I wrong about believing in Jesus? I don’t think so, but it won’t be until I close my eyes for the last time on this earth that I’ll be able to say I KNOW it’s all true…and then, it won’t be faith anymore, it will be sight!
PS—Thanks again for all the outpouring of love and the many of you who are praying daily (and some more) for Samuel. God hears and answers!! The last picture is of Samuel’s father, Daniel, when he first came home from the hospital. You can see that Sammy has a way to go yet before he becomes a nice, plump, full-grown newborn!)